The Empath Guidebook – Now available in paperback.

empath guidebook amazonOver the past years, since I have put it online for free, thousands of people have downloaded The Empath Guidebook.

This book was written by me as a gift to the Empath community and covers an abundance of subjects to help new and experienced Empaths alike.

Many have also asked if this book was available in paperback format. With that request in mind, you can now choose to purchase it from amazon.com for USD19.95.

The e-book is still free for download for those who wish to have their own PDF copy.

You can download the free version here: http://www.psi-zone.net/guidebook.html

You can purchase the paperback version here or by clicking on the picture on the side bar.

If you have enjoyed this book at some point, and think this it’s worthwhile, please feel free to give it a review. It would really help me out.

 

Introducing the Empath Support Community Site.

ESCFor a while now, I’ve been thinking about creating an empath community.

Yes, I know there are already some out there, but they seem restrictive and having had my membership terminated on one of those communities (why, I’ve not real idea. Maybe they didn’t like the odd blog entry I put there) I felt it was time to give people a place where they can be themselves.

The problem I have observed with other communities is that they are controlling. They will demand people act in a certain way and if you fall out of line, you will be kicked.

I’ve also mentioned this to be the case with chat rooms.

Personally, I don’t see how one can create anything worthwhile and long-lasting if there are so many rules and restrictions in place.

With this in mind, I finally felt it was time to consolidate all the empath resources I have created on the web and centralize it into a one stop shop that people can join, connect and share their own thoughts, ideas and concerns.

For all those Empaths, Highly sensitive people and psychics who are looking for a place to be, the Empath Support and Community site may be for you.

There you will find the chat room, this blog, my empath website, groups, forums, and the ability to create your own profile, befriend others and blog what’s on your mind.

As with the chat room, all you need do is remain courteous and not attack another and you are welcome.

This is an open group and all you need is a valid e-mail address to join.

You can find the ESC at empathsupport.com (the blog will be at https://xeraphax.wordpress.com/ until domain mapping have been worked out.)

Running a chat room – The challenges and frustrations.

Empath ChatroomI’ve been involved in chat rooms since I first joined the internet back in 1995.

Back then, it was amazing and new and there was an innocence about it that seems to be no longer present today.

In that time, I’ve been part of the chat community in one way or another, either as a user, a moderator or admin.

Over the years, I’ve seen some very popular chat rooms come and go, including the now dead Celestine Vision chat room.

I’ve learned a lot by observation and seeing what worked and what didn’t work.

When I started my own chat room back in 2009, I knew what I wanted it to be.

It had a very clear agenda and one that has remained faithful .

But running a chat room, no matter what your agenda is a tricky business.

One thing that became very clear early on for me was that no matter what you do, you are always going to upset someone.

Someone will always be unhappy with how you do things.

Someone will always accuse you of doing something or not doing something the way they feel it should be done.

I always found this odd as you are paying for a place that is free without asking for anything in return and yet many act as though they are buying a service.

Running a chat room is quite a challenge, especially one that you want to cater to all.

You have to know when to ban, when to warn and when things are getting out of hand.

You have to choose the right moderators to support you. The wrong ones can create more drama than you ever would want.

People will accuse you of things you don’t do, such as spying and reading private conversations in logs and while one can certainly do that, anyone who has ever looked at a transcript will know just how tedious and horrible they are to follow.  It’s time consuming and if you’re busy or tired, you honestly just don’t care about it.

Chat rooms always attract their share of trolls and know-it-alls.  They are people who sit in judgement of others, come there to cause trouble or feel they know better than anyone else.   People who don’t have a sense of humour and take themselves very seriously. (I always say, never trust someone who can’t laugh at themselves or doesn’t recognize an obvious joke.)

What kind of room you want depends on what your agenda is.

Many fail because they are too controlling and too selective, banning at the drop of a hat.

Others fail because there are no guidelines in place.

Many of the chats I’ve visited are there as a vehicle to stroke the creator’s ego. Those generally don’t do that well.

As I mentioned in a previous post, the focus of my room is synchronicity. That is, people come and visit and find what they need. That might be answers, other people or just a pointer to another place.

My secondary focus is support for empathic and spiritual people. That’s a tricky one; because “spiritual” has a very broad definition and no one can be ‘on’ full time. (If they are, you can guarantee burnout is not that far away!)

I’ve seen people visit the room and complain that there is no spiritual chat happening and leave. To those I say: wait a bit or start your own topic. People will come. They may not agree with your point of view, but if you’re there just to validate your own views, you are probably wasting your time in any case.

One of the things I have learned over the years is that trying to control and restrict things is a bad idea.

My philosophy is:

Everyone is human (which is, they are all part of this human experience and thus subject to the emotions most have.)  There are a few exceptions (Omen, I’m looking at you!) but generally people will fall into that category.

Everyone has bad days.

Everyone wants to chill out once in a while.

Everyone swears from time to time.

Everyone has a time where they want to vent.

There are people who like to connect energetically with people and do more with them on a cyber level.

Everyone has their own particular agenda and interest.

To except people to act in a certain way, especially one that is contrary to who they are and to their nature, is not healthy or logical. It’s a recipe for frustration, resentment and anger.

Giving people a place where they can do what they want seems to be a reasonable thing to do.

To that effect, there are a few rooms that cater for various situations.

As mentioned, people also swear so swearing is allowed, as long as it’s not abusive.

I try to keep the philosophy simple: Be nice to each other and do not attack or invalidate another.

Simple respect and acceptance can go a long way. It’s what makes a room an interesting place to be.

It’s simple in theory, but much more difficult in practice.

I try and handle this by trusting in my feelings. Knowing who is potentially trouble and who is there to find help.

It’s also trusting in the ebbs and flows of the energy. The room will never be amazing 100% of the time. In fact, I think if you can get it where it’s fine around 50%, then you are doing well.

Running a chat room is a depressing and dispiriting experience. You get a lot of hate.  It’s like painting a big target on yourself. It doesn’t matter if you go there or not (in fact, there have been some years where I barely entered the room) people will still hate you. Being an Empath, you will pick up on that hate and it doesn’t do a lot for your morale.

You might ask why do I bother?

I do it because I know there is a need for it and I will continue to do so until that need is no longer, or I am gone.

To those who feel they can do a better job, I say, please go ahead. The net needs more good chat room.

To those who think I have no clue what I’m doing, then I say to them, please go and try it yourself and let me know how it works out.

To anyone who succeeds in creating a chat room that not only works, but helps others, then you have my respect and appreciation.

Thank you.

The Synchronicity, Empath and Spiritual chat room can be found here.

All are welcome to visit.

 

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 4 of 4

creating

Photo by Maxime Bhm

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 4

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

In part three we discussed practicing your abilities.

Now we’ll look at the final two: Grounding and creating.

 

Grounding.

When you are ungrounded, it’s very hard to get a handle on your abilities. The key to grounding is self-confidence. When you doubt yourself, you will rarely be secure or grounded. This can occur when you doubt your feelings, feel that you don’t belong somewhere or take someone else’s point of view over yours.

Self-doubt is the nemesis of the Empath. They cannot afford to allow it if they wish to live a happy life and use their abilities to help others and their own path.

Whatever you do, do it with conviction. Whatever you do, make sure it matches your feelings. If it feels wrong, don’t do it.

And whatever you do, don’t get stuck in a mindset that you feel you have the answers. Nothing is absolute as everything is always changing. Always be open to new ways and new perceptions. If you become stuck, you can not only stall your growth, but lead an increasingly miserable existence.

Always allow change, but always make sure that change is in line with who you are. All change it good, even though it may seem tragic or horrible at the time. Remember, we often can’t see the forest for the trees.

And the final and seventh step isCreating.

And by that, I mean take back your creating power and letting it work for you, rather than letting others create your reality for you. We are all creators, in spite of what others may believe. We have the power and abilities to create a reality that is amazing and wonderful.

We are always creating with every thought and action. We do not realize it, though. Then when things turn out horribly, we do not understand that it was ourselves that created it. 

We do this in so many unwitting ways. We believe we are not good enough. That we do not deserve to be happy. That we are not worthy of riches, fame and success. That we are not capable of doing the things others can do.

But truth is: We are. We have exactly what we need in order to achieve what we came here for. It may not seem that way, but free dictates that you must have it, otherwise it would not be free will.

So remember, every thought, action and state of being is creative. Watch everything you think and say. Even simple words such as: ‘I’m sick and tired of this’ will eventually create a reality where you really are sick and tired. And you will not see it as something you created. You’ll simply see it as validation for what you’ve been saying all along.

Choose to take back your creative power. Choose to take reasonability for your life and circumstances. You are not there by chance. Nothing is random (unless you believe that it is, in which case you are choosing a random existence.)

Choose to be an amazing Empath that can life a joyful and prosperous life with full control over their abilities.

As always, choose wisely. 

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 3 of 4

Practice

Photo by João Silas

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 3

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

Today we’ll look at Practicing your abilities, which is step five.

Practicing your abilities.

The more you use something, the more proficient and comfortable you will become at using it. Don’t be afraid of failures or when things did not pan out like you expected them to. Those are valuable experiences in what works and what doesn’t work. It’s not unusual to sometimes get a false positive.

A false positive?

Something that feels right, but isn’t. Now I know that sounds contradictory as to me saying, trust your feelings, but it’s worth noting this:

Sometimes when you feel something is true, but you find that it isn’t, look deeper. There will be truth, but it may well appear in a certain context.

For instance, if you sense something happening for someone but you are told this has not happened, it may well be because you are sensing something that may happen, has happened or is happening, but the subject does not acknowledge it. Also, such things can be a matter of perspective and terminology.

You know, that is a cop out. Psychics use that excuse all the time when they get something wrong.

We’re not talking about charlatans. We’re not talking about people who do cold readings. We’ve already established that the person is an Empath. They are picking up feelings and possibly much, much more. They are not out to scam anyone.

We are discussing how they should develop their abilities and what happens if something feels right but isn’t. So do not confuse the two.

Okay, difference is noted.

A false positive is when something is right, but you do not have the right context to put it into. Do not dismiss it, simply put it aside and see what else comes up. It is completely possible to tell someone something they are in denial of, and so they will not acknowledge something in spite of it being true.

All it means is that it’s not what needs to be heard right now. It may not be true for that person right at the point of time, but there will be truth in retrospect. Hence, you have a positive, but it’s not the time to discuss it. Trust in your feelings on that one. You will often feel you shouldn’t tell someone something. Listen to that.

If it’s true, then it’s not a false positive. It’s not false at all.

It means that it feels right, but circumstances make it not right. It still is true, but is not acknowledged as such. You are thinking of it appearing true, in spite of the fact that it is not true. While that is also termed as a false positive, it is another definition of the term. 

Next Part four: Grounding and Creating

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? – Part 2 of 4

Research

Photo by João Silas

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 2

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

We previously discussed Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

Today we’ll at Research and Self-awareness.

 

Research.

When you discover you are an empath, try to learn as much as about the subject as is possible. This is actually not too hard nowadays as there is truly an abundance of information out there on the internet. There isn’t even any need to pay for such information as it’s freely available.

I have seen Empath tool kits for sale. I don’t know much about them but I assume they would be helpful?

Toolkits tend to repackage what is already freely available and sell as new information. However, if you decide to pay for one, it may not provide the answers you seek because you do not really know what you are getting.

There are really many Empaths out there, and connecting to others through forums or support groups is a good start. Sharing experiences, ideas and personal thought with others who are of the same mind set can be very helpful.

Just remember, there are many informative sites out there that offer that type of information for free.

The Empath Guidebook is just one such book and many other giving souls have written some amazing work for the beginning Empath.

Self-awareness.

Once you know and understand you are an Empath, it’s time to start observing yourself being an Empath, and looking at where your feelings begin and end. As amazing as it may seem, people, in general, really do not know themselves all that well. They might think that they do, but you’d be surprised at just how many refuse to really look at who they are being and how they react to things. Often the ego will not allow them to do so, fearing that they may not see themselves as a good or spiritual person or like what they see.

But knowing oneself does not mean you have to accept what you find. It’s not until you accept where you are at right now that you can begin to change what you wish to become.

Know yourself. Trust in what you feel. Feel what you know and you will begin to understand who you really are. Define your boundaries. Declare to the world: ‘This is who I am’ and take pride in it.

Who you are is personal. No one can tell you to be something you are not, or who you don’t wish to be. Whatever you choose to be, let every action reflect that, and in the course of time, you will become that person.

Be aware. Always look at your thoughts and actions and decide if that is who you wish to be. 

Next: Part three: Practicing your abilities.