Category: Highly Sensitive Person

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Somethings you have to go one step back in order to go two steps forward.

Two steps forward

Raul Taciu
Two steps forward…

Things are going along nicely for a change. You’ve had a revelation. You’ve reached an epiphany.

Life is flowing and things are good. It can only get better from here on in.

Then suddenly, without warning, you find yourself back at square one. It feels as though all your progress is gone. Things feel just as bad, if not worse, and you fall into despair because you were doing so well… and now you’re not.

That anger that you felt you had gotten past  and has allowed you to move on is back in full force and you even feel angrier than before.

Or it might be some trauma, fear, resentment, or lack of self-confidence.

Sound familiar?

What happened?

This is a very common scenario, especially for those on the spiritual path. For them it’s 2 steps forward and 1 step back. It’s very frustrating and most don’t really understand what is going on.

So let’s look at what is really happening.

There will indeed be times when we feel like we’re making headway. We are moving forward so fast and feeling so amazing that we feeling that nothing can stop us.

Then we hit that wall.

Ouch!

Why?

If we’ve faced and conquered our demons, so to speak, then why are they back?

And one step back.

The truth is, you haven’t conquered them fully. You’ve just dealt with one aspect of them. It’s allowed you to reach a new understanding, but there is still more work to do. You may revisit the same thing over and over, each time chipping away at another piece of it until finally you have removed the entire block, and are really ready to move onto new things.

This is normal. It’s not always possible to deal with something in its entirety, especially if it’s deep, long term and part of your belief system.

You have to take it in stages. You have to look at it from different angles, and each stage can feel almost the same, but there are subtle differences.

Or if it is the same, then you’ve not retained what you learned, and you need to have a refresher in what you needed to know.

Life is a process. We can move forwards and backward at the same time, and sometimes you need to move backwards in order go forward.

Remember, if something isn’t there within you to begin with, you wouldn’t be facing it. So you need to deal with it according to your abilities so you can heal it.

Healing can take a long time. There is no time limit to how long it may take. Some feel embarrassed about having the same issues come up over and over again. They may feel like a broken record, but that’s just how it goes. Eventually, if you keep at it, you will heal and get past those things that hold you back.

The problem is that most people get discouraged and give up. They forget how much progress they actually made.

This is the worst thing you can do, though. Giving up will never get you to where you desire to be.

Yes, it can be painful, and yes, you may feel like you’ll never get there, but this I promise you. Keep at it, and you will succeed. Things will shift around for you to make it happen.

Life is a process of creation. You are the creator. Trust in the flow and know that you can’t help but get there in the end, no matter how bad things seem right now.

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Do not fear the darkness… thank it instead.

light and darkThere’s a parable by Neale Donald Walsch called The Little Soul and the Sun. There are two parts to this tale. In a nutshell, the story is about a soul who wanted to know who he was., but because all there was, was light, and all he was, was light, he could not do this.
It begins:

There once was a soul who knew itself to be the light. This was a new soul, and so, anxious for experience. “I am the light,” it said. “I am the light.” Yet all the knowing of it and all the saying of it could not substitute for the experience of it. And in the realm from which this soul emerged, there was nothing but the light. Every soul was grand, every soul was magnificent, and every soul shone with the brilliance of God’s awesome light. And so the little soul in question was as a candle in the sun. In the midst of the grandest light — of which it was a part — it could not see itself, nor experience itself as Who and What it Really Is.

And then goes on to explain that in order for the soul to know itself, it must separate itself from all that is and call upon the darkness so it may know its own light and experience who he or she really is.

But in order for that soul aspect to know itself as light, someone had to play the part of being the darkness.

In this story, the soul wished to experience forgiveness, but as there was no one to forgive; someone had to play that part.

Another soul offered: “I will come into your next physical lifetime and do something for you to forgive. I ask only one thing in return,”

“Anything! Anything!” the Little Soul cried.

“In the moment that I strike you and smite you, in the moment that I do the worst to you that you could ever imagine – in that self-same moment…remember Who I Really Am.”

“Oh, I won’t forget!” promised the Little Soul. “I will see you in the perfection with which I hold you now, and I will remember Who You Are, always.”

This story illustrates perfectly why we have darkness. Why there are demons, and why people attack and hurt us.

And while many people do indeed seem to understand that all we do is because we have created it on some level, and that is our free will in action, they seem to forget the very thing they need to remember.

The ones who are dark are dark because without them, we could not experience our own light.

Far too often, I see people condemning demons, so called evil, people who have wronged them and cursing them to Hell (or whatever place they feel is punishing enough. )

Far too often people insist that there is no help for those being and they are not worthy or their time, their healing, or even their love or blessings.

But is this really what we should be doing? So called negative beings don’t remember who they really are. Perhaps they have chosen a part where, by necessity, they cannot have any connection to the light. No matter what is done, they will always be of the dark because that is what is required. And they will remain so until they eventually return, with the rest, to source.

People seem to take great pride in condemning that which they consider to be dark. They simply love to hate and detest anything that doesn’t meet their own personal standards.

But condemning the dark is as useless as condemning the night. Everything is there for a reason. It wouldn’t exist otherwise.

I can’t help but wonder how horrible it would be to be hated by everyone, attacked and detested just for being.

Personally, I feel we should bless the darkness. Thank them for their gift and even their sacrifice. Those who have even experienced a little of what it’s like to not have light in your life should understand what it is like to be like them.

They may not remember who they are. They may never be able to in this realm, but that doesn’t mean we should forget, either.

And while you may not agree or condone their actions, always come from a place of love, rather than hate or fear.

Someone has to play the bad guy. Perhaps one day it may be you.

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Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 4 of 4

creating

Photo by Maxime Bhm

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 4

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

In part three we discussed practicing your abilities.

Now we’ll look at the final two: Grounding and creating.

 

Grounding.

When you are ungrounded, it’s very hard to get a handle on your abilities. The key to grounding is self-confidence. When you doubt yourself, you will rarely be secure or grounded. This can occur when you doubt your feelings, feel that you don’t belong somewhere or take someone else’s point of view over yours.

Self-doubt is the nemesis of the Empath. They cannot afford to allow it if they wish to live a happy life and use their abilities to help others and their own path.

Whatever you do, do it with conviction. Whatever you do, make sure it matches your feelings. If it feels wrong, don’t do it.

And whatever you do, don’t get stuck in a mindset that you feel you have the answers. Nothing is absolute as everything is always changing. Always be open to new ways and new perceptions. If you become stuck, you can not only stall your growth, but lead an increasingly miserable existence.

Always allow change, but always make sure that change is in line with who you are. All change it good, even though it may seem tragic or horrible at the time. Remember, we often can’t see the forest for the trees.

And the final and seventh step is: Creating.

And by that, I mean take back your creating power and letting it work for you, rather than letting others create your reality for you. We are all creators, in spite of what others may believe. We have the power and abilities to create a reality that is amazing and wonderful.

We are always creating with every thought and action. We do not realize it, though. Then when things turn out horribly, we do not understand that it was ourselves that created it. 

We do this in so many unwitting ways. We believe we are not good enough. That we do not deserve to be happy. That we are not worthy of riches, fame and success. That we are not capable of doing the things others can do.

But truth is: We are. We have exactly what we need in order to achieve what we came here for. It may not seem that way, but free dictates that you must have it, otherwise it would not be free will.

So remember, every thought, action and state of being is creative. Watch everything you think and say. Even simple words such as: ‘I’m sick and tired of this’ will eventually create a reality where you really are sick and tired. And you will not see it as something you created. You’ll simply see it as validation for what you’ve been saying all along.

Choose to take back your creative power. Choose to take reasonability for your life and circumstances. You are not there by chance. Nothing is random (unless you believe that it is, in which case you are choosing a random existence.)

Choose to be an amazing Empath that can life a joyful and prosperous life with full control over their abilities.

As always, choose wisely. 

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Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 3 of 4

Practice

Photo by João Silas

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 3

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

Today we’ll look at Practicing your abilities, which is step five.

Practicing your abilities.

The more you use something, the more proficient and comfortable you will become at using it. Don’t be afraid of failures or when things did not pan out like you expected them to. Those are valuable experiences in what works and what doesn’t work. It’s not unusual to sometimes get a false positive.

A false positive?

Something that feels right, but isn’t. Now I know that sounds contradictory as to me saying, trust your feelings, but it’s worth noting this:

Sometimes when you feel something is true, but you find that it isn’t, look deeper. There will be truth, but it may well appear in a certain context.

For instance, if you sense something happening for someone but you are told this has not happened, it may well be because you are sensing something that may happen, has happened or is happening, but the subject does not acknowledge it. Also, such things can be a matter of perspective and terminology.

You know, that is a cop out. Psychics use that excuse all the time when they get something wrong.

We’re not talking about charlatans. We’re not talking about people who do cold readings. We’ve already established that the person is an Empath. They are picking up feelings and possibly much, much more. They are not out to scam anyone.

We are discussing how they should develop their abilities and what happens if something feels right but isn’t. So do not confuse the two.

Okay, difference is noted.

A false positive is when something is right, but you do not have the right context to put it into. Do not dismiss it, simply put it aside and see what else comes up. It is completely possible to tell someone something they are in denial of, and so they will not acknowledge something in spite of it being true.

All it means is that it’s not what needs to be heard right now. It may not be true for that person right at the point of time, but there will be truth in retrospect. Hence, you have a positive, but it’s not the time to discuss it. Trust in your feelings on that one. You will often feel you shouldn’t tell someone something. Listen to that.

If it’s true, then it’s not a false positive. It’s not false at all.

It means that it feels right, but circumstances make it not right. It still is true, but is not acknowledged as such. You are thinking of it appearing true, in spite of the fact that it is not true. While that is also termed as a false positive, it is another definition of the term. 

Next Part four: Grounding and Creating

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Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? – Part 2 of 4

Research

Photo by João Silas

So you’re an Empath, huh? – Part 2

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

We previously discussed Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

Today we’ll at Research and Self-awareness.

 

Research.

When you discover you are an empath, try to learn as much as about the subject as is possible. This is actually not too hard nowadays as there is truly an abundance of information out there on the internet. There isn’t even any need to pay for such information as it’s freely available.

I have seen Empath tool kits for sale. I don’t know much about them but I assume they would be helpful?

Toolkits tend to repackage what is already freely available and sell as new information. However, if you decide to pay for one, it may not provide the answers you seek because you do not really know what you are getting.

There are really many Empaths out there, and connecting to others through forums or support groups is a good start. Sharing experiences, ideas and personal thought with others who are of the same mind set can be very helpful.

Just remember, there are many informative sites out there that offer that type of information for free.

The Empath Guidebook is just one such book and many other giving souls have written some amazing work for the beginning Empath.

Self-awareness.

Once you know and understand you are an Empath, it’s time to start observing yourself being an Empath, and looking at where your feelings begin and end. As amazing as it may seem, people, in general, really do not know themselves all that well. They might think that they do, but you’d be surprised at just how many refuse to really look at who they are being and how they react to things. Often the ego will not allow them to do so, fearing that they may not see themselves as a good or spiritual person or like what they see.

But knowing oneself does not mean you have to accept what you find. It’s not until you accept where you are at right now that you can begin to change what you wish to become.

Know yourself. Trust in what you feel. Feel what you know and you will begin to understand who you really are. Define your boundaries. Declare to the world: ‘This is who I am’ and take pride in it.

Who you are is personal. No one can tell you to be something you are not, or who you don’t wish to be. Whatever you choose to be, let every action reflect that, and in the course of time, you will become that person.

Be aware. Always look at your thoughts and actions and decide if that is who you wish to be. 

Next: Part three: Practicing your abilities. 

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Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? – part 1 of 4

I’ve just found out

I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

So, what are the first things any newly discovered Empath should do?

We’ll look at seven steps that may well help any new Empath. While they are not in any particular order, they will be presented as one leading to the other.

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

Today we’ll look at Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

Yes

Step one:

Acceptance.

One of the main problems with finding out that you’re an Empath is the doubt one feels. The first question they generally have is: Am I really an Empath?

The answer, as a rule, is, yes, you are. This is certainly true for those who fit the traits of an Empath. However, to their mind, it seems like such a big thing that they can’t comprehend it.

It’s as though you suddenly discover you have psychic powers (and you do) but in your mindset, this is something that only occurs in movies and fantasy fiction.

Comprehending that you are actually an Empath is hard because the first thought that tends to go through one’s mind is: It’s only me. I’m no one special. There must be some mistake!

I’m sure not everyone thinks that way, though.

Some are born self-aware and some have that self-awareness drummed out of them by their parents, peers and the religion they are born into. Generally, if you tell your ‘non-psychic’ friends that you may have some abilities, they will be prone to dismiss this, most likely saying that you are just too oversensitive. This leads to invalidation and doubt.

There is a strange perception that someone else must know more than you do, even though they aren’t living your experiences. We let other people’s points of views and belief systems overwrite our own, and thus, we, ourselves, invalidate our belief systems.

So be aware of that. No one can really tell you what you feel and experience. You need to validate that for yourself.

You don’t need outside Validation

Which brings us to the second step:

Trusting in yourself.

The biggest stumbling block with any psychic ability is that there is no trust that it is real, or that what you are feeling is correct.

It cannot be repeated often enough that your feelings are your truth. If something feels right for you, then it is right for you. If it doesn’t, and your intuition feels like it’s in panic mode, then take notice of that.

You don’t need outside validation. No amount of that will help you anyway. You will always doubt in your heart. You have to listen and trust in what you feel. 

Next: Part two: Research and Self-awareness