Tag: personal experience

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Personal experiences: Part 1 – The presence on the stairway or don’t go there alone in the dark.

The dark staircase

This is a six part story about a paranormal event that occurred in January 1980. As usual, it’s told without any embellishments and according to a document that I had written after the event.

As a youth, my father insisted that I play in a brass band, and so I ended up playing that Euphonium. So every year I would end up going on a god awful band camp to play awful music that your family would end up politely listening to in the inevitable end of camp concert we’d subject them to.

Between January 13th and 26th, 1980, I attended one of those camps for The Victorian State Youth Band.

During this camp, quite a few unusual events occurred.

After the camp, I took it upon myself to write it all down, lest I forget. I’m glad I did, as I had forgotten most of it. What follows is my slightly edited version.

This camp was held at a Christian boarding school which, I recall correctly was called St. Patrick’s College in Ballarat, Victoria, Australia, which is a historical gold mining town.

There were two large rooms for sleeping in, and one of them led to a landing and a stair way.

When going down the steps that lead to the showers, a then friend of mine, (let’s call him Shawn), claimed that he got an uneasy feeling there and he didn’t like going down there at night.

At the time, I dismissed this as just being in his mind so he dared me to go down there myself. I did, and I did feel uneasy, but considering I did it in the dark, I would naturally feel that way.

There was nothing special about the staircase. Just two flights of steps winding from the boy’s dormitory down to the boy’s shower block.  As a rule, it was well lit, though the light bulbs kept on blowing. Five times in total, which is also something I have noticed occurring whenever there appears to be some type of spirit energy play going on. It was that, or just bad wiring!

Hanging on one of the walls, was also this abstract painting on the first landing. It was like a red angry face, and I didn’t like it. It gave me the creeps. Personally, if I had to put what happened down to anything, I would have to say that this entity was connected to the painting. In my experience, such things are possible, and it would certainly not be the last time I’d see something like that.

It wasn’t very long, though before we both felt a slight tingling in our mind every time we went through the double doors that lead to the stairs. It was a pricking sensation, like walking through a field of static electricity. It was almost as if some force was pushing against you. This gradually got stronger over a matter of days. It certainly didn’t take very long for it to become noticed by several of us.

Now, more than likely, this was the power of suggestion at work. I know what I felt (and considering I was always under some kind of psychic attack back then) I may have been more sensitive to it. I couldn’t speak for Shawn, though. I just accepted that he was feeling what I was feeling, and of course, everyone else joined in.

It’s like your tongue. You don’t feel it, even though it’s always there. But if you think about it, then you notice it, and somehow it doesn’t seem to fit into your mouth correctly.

So I certainly can’t discount that people focusing on feeling weird would not have produced something from their own minds.

It also could have been a group phenomenon brought on by suggestion and then our minds creating this.

What probably didn’t help was that I had shared a few of my own experiences, as I was want to do in my youth. I didn’t have many people I could talk to back then, and it was still all exciting and dramatic for me.

So, by taking about possessions and attacks, I’m sure I fueled the imagination of others.

Now, whether we attracted something or something was already there, or we made the entire thing up, I am not sure, but the things that followed were out of the tackiest Hollywood horror movie.

Interestingly enough, as I told the others about my experiences, these black beetles filled the dormitory and fell around my bed. Strangely enough, none fell around the stairway or the toilet area which was only meters away.

I’m not sure what type of beetles they were and if you asked me to identify one now, I wouldn’t be able to as there are a few varieties that are black, fly and swarm.

These ones apparently just dropped dead once they reached my bed, and I’ve no clue if that is normal behaviour or something that was unique.

I will note, though, this happened at two different times during the camp, the second time being after a group of boys had messed around with a ritual.

I’ve not actually seen anything of that nature occur before or since.

Next: The séance. 

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Creating our reality series: My personal belief system or I’ve finally had enough of failing!

the fact factory [website link]

I’ve spoken a lot about changing your reality, but so far, I’ve not really provided any examples.

So let me share with you my own experiences.

I’ve previously spoken about my dark night of the soul period, which was a very hard and traumatic period of time. This occurred back in 1994, and it was the breaking of old belief systems and the embracing of a new one.

And with the embracing of a new belief system, you would think that everything from then on in would go smoothly.

Not the case.

In fact, all that changed was my spiritual belief system.

However, this did not affect my real life  belief system of my physical world.

On that level, nothing actually changed.

Yes, I was trusting my intuition now, and I was following a path that I was meant to be on, but my belief system of how people treated me and the outcomes had not changed.

There was no reason for it to as all I had done was experience the cycle of rejection time and time again, and deep down, I was convinced that nothing would change.

And so it didn’t. In fact, it was only a few months later, in 1995, where things fell apart, yet again, (and as usual over a lady I was attracted to!) that I had decided I had had enough.

Intuition and synchronicity had led me to the information what I needed to change my 3D belief system, and I was now more than ready to try it.

What follows is taking directly from my diaries from February 1995, and it is very personal, but I publish it in the hope that it may help others who are where I was at.


What’s really been impressed upon me over the last few years and especially over the last few days is that we each make our own reality. We each, by the powers of our mind, shape and form what we believe is going to happen.

What is my reality? Because until I know what I really perceive, I shall keep on going through the same things over and over again. What is my reality?

My belief system.

  • I believe that life is full of strive.
  • I believe that people will always let you down
  • I believe that I will fail in the short term, though ultimately I shall succeed.
  • I believe that when things are going well, misery comes from nowhere to shatter the calm.
  • I believe that life is really a bitch and you just can’t fight it.
  • I believe that I can’t change my reality.
  • I believe that no matter what I try, I shall always fail with women.

What a negative belief system. How horrible and unrealistic. I wrote all that without even thinking about it.

Let’s see what positives I can come up with.

  • I believe that I truly have the power to change things. (But I can’t access the power to do so.)
  • I believe that this may be my last incarnation on earth. (But I could be wrong.)
  • I believe that I’ll never have any money problems.
  • I believe that I can fix up any problem in my body.
  • I believe that I can make a difference.
  • I believe that everything has its purpose and timing.

Now, here’s the catch. This last belief is what really holds me back. Subconsciously, if I fail, I simply use the reasoning that it wasn’t meant to be. Now, perhaps this is the illusion. The only thing that wasn’t meant to be was the fact that I didn’t perceive what could be. (I think this is getting complicated.)

In short; my reality stinks. It is negative and almost self-destructive. This is truly a world of illusion. I make the realities and it’s about time I set down some real belief systems.

  • Fact: I can protect myself and others.
  • Fact: Everything always turns out alright in the end, even when it doesn’t appear to be that way.
  • Fact: I am a true power. I have held myself back for too many years. I’ve been scared, lazy, worried, and just plain afraid that I could not do this.
  • Everything I expect tends to happen to me.
  • I expected that this current transformation would be difficult. It has been.
  • I expect that everyone will let me down eventually. They have.
  • I expect all the wrong bloody things.

               

I AM THE CENTER OF MY REALITY. FROM THIS MOMENT ON, ALL THAT HAPPENS TO ME SHALL BE BECAUSE I INFLUENCE IT. 

MY NEW BELIEF SYSTEM

Everybody, no matter who it is, will do what is right by me. No matter what their intent is, they will have no choice but to do right by me. If they try to do the wrong thing, then they will find that they will be compelled to do the right thing. They will do this because this is now my belief.

I have now released enough of the traumas and negatives in my life to become the light I can be. People will now want to be with me. People will now want to have me around. People will not be able to deny me because I will make them happy and help and enlighten them.

I am no longer unlucky in love, friendship or relationship. This is because I am pleasure to be around. In fact, far from being unable to find the right partner, I will be surrounded by the right people. This is now my reality. I shall have choice. I shall be able to pick and choose. Those who will not become my partners will become my friends.

I can really make a difference to this world. And I shall make a difference. This is so because this is now my belief.

I am a being of light, love and harmony.

I am no longer unhappy. All that happens to me now is positive and uplifting. If something bad happens, I have the answers and the solutions and the way of implementing them. They will come to me and I am able to solve any problem. There are no more problems, only solutions. This is so because this is my belief.

I am now able to develop spiritually and metaphysically. There are no more blockages. The more I learn, the more powerful I become. All my powers are used in the service of the universe and to help people grow and bring them out of the illusion and darkness. This is happening now because this is my reality.

 

THIS IS NOW MY NEW REALITY. SO BE IT.

I printed it out, read it over and over for a few weeks and then one day… everyone on that list was a reality and has become more ever since.

Did it work?

Yes. Maybe just a little too well. I got everything I asked for.

Next:  Think you were done? Think again.

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Creating our reality series: I think, therefore I am or I am, therefore I think.

The Thinker by Auguste Rodin Bronze

Have you ever really taken the time to examine your thoughts?

What you are thinking right now?

Is it in line with what you want to happen?

For many people, it is, in fact, not.

If our thoughts and intentions create our belief system, and our belief system creates our reality, then it stands to reason that everything we think is creating what we are experiencing.

Generally, it is accepted there are two main realities going on here. Our personal one, and a co-created one. The latter is everyone’s thoughts, intentions, etc, pooled into a mass of energy, and the energy creates the outcome.

The former is what we experience personally.

Two people in identical situations may experience completely different things, depending on what their belief system is.

When we say something enough times, it takes on its own energy, and becomes manifest in our lives. The more energy we put towards a though, a more powerful it becomes.

However, it’s not just what we say, it’s what we believe about ourselves in relation to those thoughts.

If you say or think: I will be rich, but your true thought behind it is, yeah, right, I don’t believe that for a moment, you will find that such things take longer to manifest, if at all.

It’s all about your core belief and what you are  really expecting.

There are exceptions, of course, and they have to exist in order for us to progress, but for now, I’m going to focus on comment things people say.

Phrases such as,

  • I am sick and tired
  • I can’t afford this
  • I don’t have the time
  • I can’t do this
  • I’m fed up

just to name a few are often said without thought, like a mantra.  Eventually what happens is that even though you may not mean it to begin with, when said enough times, they will start to manifest, and once things start to manifest, they become your reality.

They may not have started off as part of your belief system, but they will end up being so because they will become your experience.

You might say, yeah, okay, so if I say the opposite, then that’s really going to work, right!?

And you’re right, it won’t work, because you’ve already decided it can’t. Saying the opposite will not produce those results if your belief is that nothing is going to change. It especially will not work if you are out to prove that this doesn’t work.

And curiously enough, if you do have a success, the general inclination is to dismiss it as coincidence, rather than validation.

Next: Experiences outside of  yourself.

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Spirit Guides – Part 4 – I hope Marvel doesn’t sue me. :)

The following blog  is a 8 part series on Spirit Guides, my experiences, and what you might do in order to contact your own. 

Enjoy

Discovering the Dakini – Part 2

Mind travelling is a kind of astral travel. You can’t class it as an out of body experience, though. It’s where you are fully conscious but your mind is viewing things elsewhere. Many people do it, and dismiss it as day dreams, though experience has taught me that it may be anything but.

As mentioned in the last entry, I felt a very strong compulsion to be somewhere, so I followed it.

I found myself in what you might term an astral level. For some reason, I wasn’t happy, and I began to shake these astral corridors and filled them with light. Those corridors are like sub areas in the planes where entities can hide from view but are still able to observe. Somehow, I was able to shake them out and into view and I recall many entities running for cover.

I then felt myself darting about the place at an extremely fast pace, as though I was avoiding something. Suddenly I came across the giant lizard again. However, something about it looked odd. It was just standing there. It did not react to my presence in any way. It was as though it was waiting for something.

Next to it was this machine which was producing small dark bubbles. I had come across these machines before in my mind journeys, and I felt that the purpose was to produce certain types of energy, maybe for attacks or to corrupt auras.

I then heard a voice instructing me to destroy the machine. As I felt that whatever it was, it wasn’t a good thing to have around I decided to do just that.

Then the same voice urged me to destroy the lizard. However, I didn’t make a move. Destroying anything sentient was against who I was. Even though people had, in the past,  urged me to destroy evil or dark beings, I found I just couldn’t do it.

It was then that I noticed the lizard didn’t seem real. I took a closer look and found it wasn’t. It was clearly a decoy.  Then the real one appeared behind me.

In retrospect, I figured there were two scenarios here. If I had attacked the decoy I would  have been ambushed. I also would have left myself wide open to the lizard’s energies as engaging in battle would have attuned me to those energies, leaving me vulnerable. (This is certainly the subject of another topic.)

The other was that it saw I wasn’t going to attack, so it felt it was safe to attack me as I probably wouldn’t defend myself or maybe I might not even be able to do so.

Either way, before it had a chance to do anything, I suddenly was surrounded by these tall beings. I looked at their faces and found they were hard to describe: Intense, severe, warrior like.  The right words don’t really come to me to explain it.

The word ‘Dakini’ flashed in my mind, and I watched as they surrounded the lizard, quickly neutralized it and then carried it away.

If I expected them to introduce themselves or make themselves known to me, I would have been disappointed. They acted as though meeting me was an everyday occurrence that was nothing special. I felt like I was just someone who they were very used to and hardly worth the acknowledgement. I found that very odd and interesting. The most I got was a glance and nod, like walking past a work colleague you see a dozen times a day and that was it.

The guiding voice in my mind told me later that they had been waiting for me to draw the lizard out so it could be taken away.

As a side note, curiously enough, I never heard again from the lady I had been chatting to after this event I don’t know if there was any connection between the two things, but it always felt like there was.

Over the next two or so days, I mulled over this incident, I felt there was to be more to this than met the eye.  I felt I was missing something here.

I also discussed it with my online friend, who said that she had had the Dakini turn up for her the week before.

Since I discovered that I could trace energies, I also had discovered that, I was able to trace them retrospectively, and thus identify many beings and the essence of people I had come across in my life, even if it was many years ago.

It took me a day or so, but it dawned on me that the guides who had been talking to me all my life, guiding me, protecting me, telling me who I was, and giving me so many other messages, had the same energy of the Dakini.

This was quite a mind blowing revelation to me. While this seemed to be one of those things where I wasn’t sure if it was suggestion on the part of people and the book or if it was real, it certainly felt right.

Next: Validation

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