Tag: 30 traits of an empath

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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 4 – The media or why does this affect me so much?

televisionA while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

4.     Watching violence, cruelty or tragedy on the TV is unbearable: The more attuned an Empath becomes the worse it is and may make it so they eventually have to stop watching TV and reading newspapers altogether.

Personally, I find watching the news pretty frustrating, especially since it’s designed to emotionally manipulate and enrage you.  I tend to catch the headlines, but I don’t really go further than that. On some level, it’s important to know what is happening out there and where everyone’s attention is.

Being an Empath means that when public sentiment and emotions are high, you are more likely to pick up it and become vulnerable.

It also depends if you’re attuned to such things or not. You could have absolutely no resonance with anything that is happening that day, and so you will not sense it.

Remember, Empaths tend to pick up on those things they relate to on some level. Sympathy pains are simply pain you resonate with in your own body. There are fears and deep seated traumas that can make them manifest when someone else brings them up. They can also be health issues that are not yet detected or are unresolved. You can take them as warnings or cautions that you are vulnerable to the same thing that is being discussed.

Weren’t we discussing the news?

The discussion is about resonating with what you are seeing on TV or when reading the newspaper. This, in effect, is about sympathy pains. Something many Empaths are vulnerable to.

Okay. I was expecting to get into a dialogue about how media is manipulative and should be treated with caution.

There isn’t much that doesn’t fall into that category. Most things you come across are manipulative in some way. This is because people are trying to achieve an end result and will craft their words and ideas in order to do that. So, yes, you can certainly suggest this is true for the media, but don’t separate them out to be the bad guys. They are simply providing a service that the public ask for. Otherwise they would not be doing it in the first place. Business goes where the money and demand is.

Of course, this is true for controlled media, too. In countries where it’s controlled by the government of the day, the media is especially notorious for trying to manipulate people. One way or another, they will succeed, though not always with the intended results.

When it comes to newspapers, televisions, movies and any other kind of communication media, you will often find that the more sensitive you become, the choosier you will become about what you decide to watch.

I know there are some movies or plots that always bring an emotional tear to my eye, even though the actual plot is contrived and paper thin.

That’s because you resonate to them on some level. You’re not reacting to a well-crafted story, you’re reacting to a deep longing, or possibly trauma that may even be based in a past life.

This is true for most people, empathic or not. They will watch the most contrived product because it’s a reflection of their own desires and experiences. If you can reach people on an emotional level, you can sell just about anything.

So back to the original point. Violence, news, and so on are hard for an Empath to cope with.

The only other point I will make is that many Empaths actually can sense when something isn’t true. So if they read or see it in the news, it will spark their sense of outrage and possible anger. No one likes being lied to of told things they know aren’t true, and an Empath will pick up on that pretty quickly.

So avoid the media?

No, not entirely. It’s worth knowing what is going on. Just don’t put any emotional investment into it. It is what it is, and is a general reflection of the current social situation. People love their drama. You don’t have to be part of it. You just need to be aware so you can act accordingly. 

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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 2 – Crowds or party on, dude???

Massive crowds after the fireworks

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

2.     Being in public places can be overwhelming: Places like shopping malls, supermarkets or stadiums, where there are lots of people around, can fill the Empath with turbulently vexed emotions that are coming from others.

 Personally, I don’t mind shopping malls and supermarkets. I’ve not really been to a stadium. At least, not in the past 30 years.

I don’t like some crowded places, such as the city on new year’s eve.

I really detest parties and night clubs. That’s like hell on earth for me.

It very much depends on the type of energy that is around you. When people gather together en masse, it creates a strong field that the Empath can easily pick up on. If the energy resonates with the Empath, they will feel at home. If not, then they will try to exit the first chance they can do it politely.

Now if you’re a sensitive type of person, you will find that alcohol fueled parties might well be  difficult to handle because alcohol often unleashes certain emotions that are often repressed.

If the Empath is already sensitive towards such things, they will find they are magnified.

I can’t say I noticed that, myself. I found it was more… I didn’t fit in and I also felt overwhelmed.

Yes, that is another thing worth understanding. Empaths will often feel like they don’t belong to such groups. These are the same people who can’t seem to connect socially. Yes, it’s true that they work fine one on one, but the bigger the crowd, the harder it becomes.

And why is that?

It’s due to actually not really belonging to certain groups. Some people are here to help, but that does not mean they are part of the people who they are helping. Now, let’s take you, personally.

You don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, enjoy parties, clubbing, demeaning people, gossip and sport like activities.

Those are all common interests that people share. You would rather go to a quiet place, have a coffee and a bite to eat and talk about spiritual topics, or something light-hearted.

While you might not find many people who you can connect to on those levels, you can certainly be sure that you are not the only one who feels that way. There are millions upon millions of others who can’t connect in this fashion. Yet, in spite of the numbers, they are sprinkled amongst the billions of people in this world. It is not unusual for someone to go through their entire life and never realize they have met someone else who feels the way they do. This may be especially due to other Empaths trying to fit in and pretend they have the interests that others have.

Add to that places that have a concentration of such people, you may not be able to function. Especially if it is filled with smoke, club music, noise, drugs and drunkenness. You will be overwhelmed with the very energies that you spend your time avoiding. You will not know what to do, let alone even function.

Many will dismiss you as a ‘party pooper’. Some will look at you and wonder what your problem is. It would be rare for anyone to realize that this is hell for the Empath, and the best thing they can do for them is to take them outside and away from the crowd.

That is also why other kinds of crowded places may not be a problem for the Empath. Malls, plaza’s, places of fun, movie theatres, etc, generally bring out the good energy in people. Some people love shopping. Others enjoy the entertainment.

Come Christmas time or a major holiday, there will be many who are pushed for time, stressed, short of money and feeling obliged to make a purchase.  Their emotions will be running high, especially when they are with a family of tired and cranky children. That is when it’s wise to avoid such crowds.

I can’t help but wonder… do people really enjoy parties? What do they get out of it?

Being with others who they can connect to. Isn’t that enough? They may not even be happy or enjoy being there, but they are with others and they can try and forget about feeling lonely and alone, at least for a little while.

So, any advice on how to cope in crowds?

Remember, the key to controlling your empathy is being grounded. The key to being grounded is your self-confidence. If you are not feeling like you belong somewhere, you will certainly not enjoy the experience. You will feel like an intruder or an outsider. 

Most Empaths who can’t tolerate crowds stay as long as they feel is politely possible, and then make their exit. They believe they will offend the host, or maybe the guest, so they hang around.

Sometimes it’s just wise to explain that you don’t function well in such situations, and you need to leave. If they don’t understand or accept this, then really, you’re better off without such people in your life. You will always feel alone, even in the most crowded place.

Yes, but remember, when you’re with friends, or with a partner, that’s not always an option. And that does not mean those people aren’t good for you in other circumstances.

That is so, however, remember they should allow for such things. If you explain you can’t cope, then that is just you being you. If they can’t tolerate that, then you are better off without them.

Remember, the more you are you, the more others will find you because you are what they are looking for.

As always, I will suggest a Bach Flower Remedy that helps.

Elm is the remedy for feeling overwhelmed, and that certainly can be useful when you’re hit with all those energy from a crowd.  

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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 1 – Knowing or what is truth?

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

  1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.

I have to say, this is one of the biggest ones for Empaths. The Knowing is something that just happens. I discussed this a little a while back when I said that people have a window to fool an Empath, and then somehow, the Empath just knows if they are being lied to or not. You can’t fool them after that.

I’ve experienced this Knowing a lot. It’s a feeling that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, you know the truth.

I’ve read about this kind of thing happening to people whose partner cheat on them. They suddenly just know.

Unfortunately, this is never enough to convince others. Your sense of truth rarely convinces another that you are right and other people are wrong.

This is one of the abilities that Empaths have. It works because they are able to connect to the collective consciousness that all are a part of.

Remember, there is really only one soul, and everything is an aspect of it. All that is, is already part of your being.

The illusion is that you are separate from everything else, and this is so we can experience ourselves in relation to those other parts.

But it is an illusion, and those who are Empathic will be connected, in spite of the illusion.

The closer to the situation someone is, the more attuned they may become, and the easier they will pick up on the truth of the matter.

That might explain why I feel anger when I sense something isn’t true.

That’s an anger borne of frustration as your sense of truth is being compromised. It should be noted, though, that there is a knowing, and there is a logic that people attempt to apply to truth.

By that I mean, you will know when someone is true. It will stand alone, as is. Those who try to get to the truth, using logic, will sense the truth of the logic, and thus assume that the outcome of that logic is the truth. It doesn’t follow that this is so, though.

I’m not quite following here.

You may sense the truth of what you are focusing on. It does not necessarily follow that the outcome of that truth is true.

For instance, you might say it rains during Summer. This is true. It does not follow, though, that it will rain. Logic dictates that rain is likely, so you will sense the truth behind that, however, there may be a drought, and no rain will come.

Sensing the truth of a statement of logic, and sensing the truth of an outcome are two different things.

Also remember, that things are always changing. What you sense today may not be what you sense tomorrow. New information may be sensed and you now have an updated version of the truth.

So, how do you know when you’ve reach the final truth?

You don’t really. You will just know what is true for you at that point of time. However, generally, you will sense that you need to sense, and that is what is important here. Truth is personal, and what may be true for you, may not be true for another.

Isn’t truth just truth? If something is true, then it’s has to be true across the board, right?

Some truths are. However,  as we create our own reality, others may not be. If I tell you it’s a hot day, and it’s only 20 degrees Celsius, you will not agree. To you, hot would be above 30 degrees Celsius. However, my truth is that I find 20 degrees hot.

Truth is individual because it’s relative.

Also, do not confuse truth with universal law.

So, if someone believes that the Earth is flat, that does not make it so.

Their perception is that it’s flat, and that is their truth based on the evidence presented and accepted. That is not what I’m talking about, though. Universal laws are those laws that work regardless of what you believe in. However, that’s really another topic.

So, in summary, Empaths have a Knowing because they are connected to their oneness and can pick up what is happening.

And the closer they are to the situation, the more attuned they may become.

From a Bach Flower Remedy point of view, I’ve found that Cerato, which is the remedy for intuition, to be very useful for clarifying truth and helping with intuition.  

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Empath Series: Empath guidebook or anyone want a free e-book?

Over the years, I considered writing a book for the Empath. Initially it was going to be Empathy 101, but when I finally looked around some years later, I found that many had already done that.

So, I decided it would probably be a better idea to write a book that was for the beginning and the advanced Empath alike.

One that went into greater details and one that gave techniques to turn the curse into a blessing.

And above all, one that could be accessible to everyone.

Sadly, I’m not given to writing simply and clearly. My words are said to be too ‘fancy’ and I deal with concepts that are every day for me, but completely new for others.

For this, I can only apologize, but it is my style, and I really haven’t worked out a way to resolve it.

So, a couple of years ago, I began work on the Empath Guidebook. So called because it was both a guide book, and I channelled my guide to help write it.

As it goes, it works for me, and I can get a lot more written when I use that technique.

Does it work as a useful book? I’ve not had enough feedback to know one way or the other.

Feedback is something people rarely give.

However, for those who actually read this blog, and want more information on Empaths, this book might well be worth your while.

I have toyed with the idea of using extracts, from time to time, on this blog, but I’ve found there’s still a lot of subject matter to cover, so I’ll just post a link to the actual document.

It is also my desire to discuss that wonderful article by ‘Just Be’ called 30 traits of an Empath with my guide. I have asked permission from the author and been granted it.

I plan to expand the book from time to time, as new ideas and information comes up.

This e-book is free.

If you decide to read it, and find it useful, please pass it onto someone who you feel can benefit from it.

The Empath Guidebook – download page.

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