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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 3 Picking up on feelings or what station and I on?

English: Robert Plutchik's Wheel of Emotions

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

 3.     Feeling others emotions and taking them on as your own: This is a huge one for Empaths. To some, they will feel emotions off those near by and with others they will feel emotions from those a vast distance away, or both. The more adept Empath will know if someone is having bad thoughts about them, even from a great distance.

This is essentially what defines an Empath. We can generally sense how people feel about us, even if what they show and what they think are two very different things.

The further removed you are from the person or the situation, the less likely you are to pick up their feelings.

That means that the more something or someone affects you, the stronger you will feel it.

This can be especially apparent at work. I could always tell when things were being done behind my back. I would always get a great sense of anxiety on the way home and sure enough, the next day, I would have received a nasty e-mail from someone, or find out someone had been attacking me. In all cases, the attacks were unjustified and unwarranted, especially as these people had nothing to do with me in my day to day job, and my work was always done quickly and to a very high standard.

My guides did not take kindly to those attacks either. They eventually took action.

You have some very protective guides. As you said, they don’t take kindly to attacks on you that you did not initiate. You will also notice that even though these people did exactly what they accused you of doing, you were the only one targeted. Also note that you were the only one trying to help people (and at times save their lives) at work. It is an oddity that, in this world, helping others is actively resisted by many.

However, what we want to discuss here is why we sense what others feel.

So, why?

We are all connected because we are one soul. Even though it is split into infinite aspects, the same energy still flows through it.

Now, that does not mean you will sense everything all at once. That’s not possible, or even healthy, unless you are on a much higher vibrational level.

What it does mean, though, is that the more you resonate with something, the more you will feel it.

Look upon people as transmitters. You are the receiver, and they are the station generating their thoughts and their feelings.

The only things you will pick up on are those you are tuned into. Now, it’s possible to have a broad range of frequencies that you can pick up on, but even that would be considered small considering that the range is infinite.

The more relevant and important something is to you, the stronger you will pick up on it. If a loved one is having a hard day, chances are, you, as an empath, will sense this.

If they are having a rough day and it’s due to you, then  you will certainly sense it very strongly.

If it’s an acquaintance, you can still pick up on their feelings, but generally only when you focus on it.

If someone is plotting behind your back, that information is important and relevant to you, so you will certainly feel something is going on.

In short, the further removed you are from the situation, the less likely you are to feel it.

But don’t some people feel everything all the time?

Not everything. They feel what they resonate with. If they resonate with fear, grief, trauma or anything that’s negative, they will most certainly pick up on all those things around them. Once again, it’s what you are attuned to. What frequency are you open to.

If someone has experienced danger and trauma in their past, they will always be open to such things because they will be trying to sense potential danger.

I will tell you this, though. The stronger the energy, the more likely people will pick up on it. Even non Empaths.

Great traumatic events, such as 9/11 was felt strongly around the world. Many psychics felt something horrible was going to happen weeks before it occurred. It was a major event.

The problem is, you can feel something is going to happen, but you can’t always work out what.

In the end, all you can do is send healing and positive energies to those feelings, and know they will help.

As an Empath, you are powerful. Enough Empaths sending positive energy and love to those they see as negative could heal this world and it wouldn’t take long.

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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 2 – Crowds or party on, dude???

Massive crowds after the fireworks

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

2.     Being in public places can be overwhelming: Places like shopping malls, supermarkets or stadiums, where there are lots of people around, can fill the Empath with turbulently vexed emotions that are coming from others.

 Personally, I don’t mind shopping malls and supermarkets. I’ve not really been to a stadium. At least, not in the past 30 years.

I don’t like some crowded places, such as the city on new year’s eve.

I really detest parties and night clubs. That’s like hell on earth for me.

It very much depends on the type of energy that is around you. When people gather together en masse, it creates a strong field that the Empath can easily pick up on. If the energy resonates with the Empath, they will feel at home. If not, then they will try to exit the first chance they can do it politely.

Now if you’re a sensitive type of person, you will find that alcohol fueled parties might well be  difficult to handle because alcohol often unleashes certain emotions that are often repressed.

If the Empath is already sensitive towards such things, they will find they are magnified.

I can’t say I noticed that, myself. I found it was more… I didn’t fit in and I also felt overwhelmed.

Yes, that is another thing worth understanding. Empaths will often feel like they don’t belong to such groups. These are the same people who can’t seem to connect socially. Yes, it’s true that they work fine one on one, but the bigger the crowd, the harder it becomes.

And why is that?

It’s due to actually not really belonging to certain groups. Some people are here to help, but that does not mean they are part of the people who they are helping. Now, let’s take you, personally.

You don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, enjoy parties, clubbing, demeaning people, gossip and sport like activities.

Those are all common interests that people share. You would rather go to a quiet place, have a coffee and a bite to eat and talk about spiritual topics, or something light-hearted.

While you might not find many people who you can connect to on those levels, you can certainly be sure that you are not the only one who feels that way. There are millions upon millions of others who can’t connect in this fashion. Yet, in spite of the numbers, they are sprinkled amongst the billions of people in this world. It is not unusual for someone to go through their entire life and never realize they have met someone else who feels the way they do. This may be especially due to other Empaths trying to fit in and pretend they have the interests that others have.

Add to that places that have a concentration of such people, you may not be able to function. Especially if it is filled with smoke, club music, noise, drugs and drunkenness. You will be overwhelmed with the very energies that you spend your time avoiding. You will not know what to do, let alone even function.

Many will dismiss you as a ‘party pooper’. Some will look at you and wonder what your problem is. It would be rare for anyone to realize that this is hell for the Empath, and the best thing they can do for them is to take them outside and away from the crowd.

That is also why other kinds of crowded places may not be a problem for the Empath. Malls, plaza’s, places of fun, movie theatres, etc, generally bring out the good energy in people. Some people love shopping. Others enjoy the entertainment.

Come Christmas time or a major holiday, there will be many who are pushed for time, stressed, short of money and feeling obliged to make a purchase.  Their emotions will be running high, especially when they are with a family of tired and cranky children. That is when it’s wise to avoid such crowds.

I can’t help but wonder… do people really enjoy parties? What do they get out of it?

Being with others who they can connect to. Isn’t that enough? They may not even be happy or enjoy being there, but they are with others and they can try and forget about feeling lonely and alone, at least for a little while.

So, any advice on how to cope in crowds?

Remember, the key to controlling your empathy is being grounded. The key to being grounded is your self-confidence. If you are not feeling like you belong somewhere, you will certainly not enjoy the experience. You will feel like an intruder or an outsider. 

Most Empaths who can’t tolerate crowds stay as long as they feel is politely possible, and then make their exit. They believe they will offend the host, or maybe the guest, so they hang around.

Sometimes it’s just wise to explain that you don’t function well in such situations, and you need to leave. If they don’t understand or accept this, then really, you’re better off without such people in your life. You will always feel alone, even in the most crowded place.

Yes, but remember, when you’re with friends, or with a partner, that’s not always an option. And that does not mean those people aren’t good for you in other circumstances.

That is so, however, remember they should allow for such things. If you explain you can’t cope, then that is just you being you. If they can’t tolerate that, then you are better off without them.

Remember, the more you are you, the more others will find you because you are what they are looking for.

As always, I will suggest a Bach Flower Remedy that helps.

Elm is the remedy for feeling overwhelmed, and that certainly can be useful when you’re hit with all those energy from a crowd.  

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Empath Guidebook – Now fully edited.

Empath cover version 1Just a quick note.

The Empath Guidebook (my free e-book) has been fully edited by the amazing Julianne Victoria.

My heartfelt thanks for doing what is a tedious and meticulous job.  I’m sure those who read the edit version will certainly thank you, too!

It’s rare to find someone so selflessly giving of their abilities and time.

I really do recommend visiting her sites (all listed below). There is a lot to this lady and she has a lot to share.

Through the Peacock’s Eyes, Insights for Spiritual Living

On the Streets of San Francisco, Photography

Facebook

Twitter

Haiku By Ku, A Poetic Pup’s Poem

Swami Zoe’s Yoga and Zen

Thank you for the gift you have given to the Empath Community.

This guidebook is ever evolving, so from time to time, there should be some major updates. Watch this space.

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Psychic series: Can we really transmit energy or some dogs are too sensitive

From time to time, I’ve pondered whether we have the ability, as empaths, to send out energy and change how people feel, or even affect the outcome of a situation.

I’ve always been slightly ambivalent about if we really do have that kind of power, in spite of the many instances I’ve experienced that seems we do.

There have been many occasions where people, who are greatly panicked or even in terror, calm immediately down and feel great reassurance when they speak to me.

As far as I’m aware, I don’t actually do anything different, but none the less, they experience this time and time again.

Are we capable of sending energy without meaning to?

Back in 1991, I visited the Powerhouse Museum in Sydney, New South Wales. I came across a device that measured your body’s electrical flow. It worked by putting your hands on two metal pads. A meter showed what the current was.

Unfortunately, I cannot recall the name of the device, so my terminology might well be wrong. However, what I found was that if I focused my thoughts to raising the needle, I found that I could move it very high.

By the power of my mind, I was able to direct energy to my hands and adjust the needle at will. The results were clearly and repeatedly shown.

It does seem that, as Empaths (and even non Empaths) we can send control our internal energies and it may follow that we can send certain energies at will.

I’ve found that if I send loving healing thoughts to crying babies, they calm down instantly.

Animals, insects and arachnids seem to respond, too.

Recently, there, was an interesting example. We allow our 14 and a half year old Doberman to sleep with us. Normally, he’ll sense if there’s something negative around us, especially after we turn off the light.

He will make a weird yelp for no apparent reason, and my partner will have me burn sage to clear the energy.

That night, though, I was too tired to get up and do this, so I send my energy to clear the area and also pacify our dog. Next thing I knew, he was snuggling against me, as close as he could get, and did not stop until around 4 a.m.

As this is certainly not typical behaviour from our dog, I can only surmise that he was picking up on my energy, and wanted more of it.

I often wonder just how much out activities influence what is around us. Last night for example, I decided to do some searching on YouTube for any genuine haunting and came across a documentary on the infamous Sallie House. Said to be one of the most haunted places in the world.

Our dog, who normally just lies on the couch sleeping, came up and kept on putting his face on my legs within minutes of me watching. Soon after, he starts giving a weird yelp at the fire place.

I decided to cleanse the area with Sage, and he settled back to normal.

Do we underestimate just how much impact our thoughts and actions have around us? Are we more powerful than we give ourselves credit for?

Some food for thought.

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Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 1 – Knowing or what is truth?

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

  1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.

I have to say, this is one of the biggest ones for Empaths. The Knowing is something that just happens. I discussed this a little a while back when I said that people have a window to fool an Empath, and then somehow, the Empath just knows if they are being lied to or not. You can’t fool them after that.

I’ve experienced this Knowing a lot. It’s a feeling that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, you know the truth.

I’ve read about this kind of thing happening to people whose partner cheat on them. They suddenly just know.

Unfortunately, this is never enough to convince others. Your sense of truth rarely convinces another that you are right and other people are wrong.

This is one of the abilities that Empaths have. It works because they are able to connect to the collective consciousness that all are a part of.

Remember, there is really only one soul, and everything is an aspect of it. All that is, is already part of your being.

The illusion is that you are separate from everything else, and this is so we can experience ourselves in relation to those other parts.

But it is an illusion, and those who are Empathic will be connected, in spite of the illusion.

The closer to the situation someone is, the more attuned they may become, and the easier they will pick up on the truth of the matter.

That might explain why I feel anger when I sense something isn’t true.

That’s an anger borne of frustration as your sense of truth is being compromised. It should be noted, though, that there is a knowing, and there is a logic that people attempt to apply to truth.

By that I mean, you will know when someone is true. It will stand alone, as is. Those who try to get to the truth, using logic, will sense the truth of the logic, and thus assume that the outcome of that logic is the truth. It doesn’t follow that this is so, though.

I’m not quite following here.

You may sense the truth of what you are focusing on. It does not necessarily follow that the outcome of that truth is true.

For instance, you might say it rains during Summer. This is true. It does not follow, though, that it will rain. Logic dictates that rain is likely, so you will sense the truth behind that, however, there may be a drought, and no rain will come.

Sensing the truth of a statement of logic, and sensing the truth of an outcome are two different things.

Also remember, that things are always changing. What you sense today may not be what you sense tomorrow. New information may be sensed and you now have an updated version of the truth.

So, how do you know when you’ve reach the final truth?

You don’t really. You will just know what is true for you at that point of time. However, generally, you will sense that you need to sense, and that is what is important here. Truth is personal, and what may be true for you, may not be true for another.

Isn’t truth just truth? If something is true, then it’s has to be true across the board, right?

Some truths are. However,  as we create our own reality, others may not be. If I tell you it’s a hot day, and it’s only 20 degrees Celsius, you will not agree. To you, hot would be above 30 degrees Celsius. However, my truth is that I find 20 degrees hot.

Truth is individual because it’s relative.

Also, do not confuse truth with universal law.

So, if someone believes that the Earth is flat, that does not make it so.

Their perception is that it’s flat, and that is their truth based on the evidence presented and accepted. That is not what I’m talking about, though. Universal laws are those laws that work regardless of what you believe in. However, that’s really another topic.

So, in summary, Empaths have a Knowing because they are connected to their oneness and can pick up what is happening.

And the closer they are to the situation, the more attuned they may become.

From a Bach Flower Remedy point of view, I’ve found that Cerato, which is the remedy for intuition, to be very useful for clarifying truth and helping with intuition.  

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Empath Series: Death or Why? – Part 2

Loss

I’ve covered this subject before, but there are people, who from time to time, find this article and have told me they’ve found it useful.

I thought I’d post what I’ve previously written here for those who have not read it yet.

This is a channeled conversation with the answers indented in italics. 

This channel continues on directly from the previous entry.

This I know, though I’m working to keep this useful for empaths in general.

It is an example. For many, death is often a catalyst for growth and awareness. They move into things that they were unlikely to do before.

There is also a belief that we must feel sad for the departed, otherwise we are a bad or uncaring person. If we do not mourn, or do not go through a certain period of time of grieving, then we may feel guilt over it.

Guilt is often a reason why we hang onto grief. We ask ourselves: how much did we really love this person if we can just move on without any sense of loss or pain. How will others view us if we are seen to ‘not care’? How do we see ourselves if we find that we don’t wish to suffer for the loss of another?

Yet, make no mistake; the departed does not need you to grieve for them. Once they reach the light, they are in bliss, and more often than not, the concerns of this world are left behind.

That does not mean they are forgotten, and when you call on your loved ones, they will come and leave many messages in many ways that they are there. Some even will manifest themselves so they can show the ones left behind that they are just fine, and they will look just beautiful.

They are fine. They are more than fine. They are home.

To those who have lost one dear to them, I promise you that you will see them again. You will be reunited, and if you both so choose, you will live more lives together for as long as you desire.

It’s one thing to know this on an intellectual level, but how do you translate this to the emotional level? How do you bring comfort to those who have lost their loved ones? Saying that they aren’t really gone doesn’t seem to be all that useful.

As I said, it is natural to feel grief for the loss of someone dear. There is also a fear that your life may never be the same, and that you cannot cope without them. They may have been tremendous support, or loved you unconditionally, or they may have been the breadwinner.

Fear is one of those emotions that is intertwined with the sense of loss. Fear for the future, fear that they won’t be able to cope alone or be capable of carrying on looking after family or children.

Death is not about the ones who have passed over, but those who are left behind.

So, how does the empath cope with death?

The key is shifting your understanding and perspective of death. Do not look upon it as something that should not have happened. If it was not meant to occur, then it would not have occurred. This does not mean you suddenly dismiss the pain, nor do you suddenly decide that it is irrelevant. It simply means that you are seeing things in a more holistic manner.

Those who you truly love will never truly leave you. They are there. They are by your side when you call, and they are helping you. You may not always feel them, but they are there.

The shift in understanding and perspective is key to coping with the sense of loss.

Do not harbour feelings of guilt of another’s death.

Do not feel that your own life is ending because someone has departed.

Do not fear that you cannot cope. You will always have what you need to make it through, and indeed thrive.

Life is about the growth and experience of the soul, and such things can be powerful catalysts.

For my own comments, I’ve found that Bach Flower Remedies can be very comforting at a time like this.

For instance:

Star of Bethlehem   to help with the shock of a loved one’s death.

Sweet Chestnut to help move from a place where you can’t accept someone is gone.

Willow if you are feeling like a victim.

Pine if you carry any guilt.

Holly for the anger you may feel.